No one likes to stay around the unhealthy INTJ. The typical INTJ is a problem solver, always looking for innovative ways to solve challenges. They are highly intellectual, see situations from a logical point of view, and are selective about the relationships they form. They prefer routine and stability and are rattled by unpredictable people and situations.
INTJs are well-respected in society because they are strategic analysts and problem solvers. They naturally become leaders and mentors regardless of whichever industry they find themselves in.
However, the unhealthy INTJ channels its positive attribute into negative behaviors, thus destroying both personal and professional relationships.
This article will explore how unhealthy INTJs behave and what they can do to change their behaviors.
Let’s delve in.
Signs of an Unhealthy INTJ
How can you spot an unhealthy INTJ? Here are some signs to look out for.
They Don’t Care About Other People’s Feelings.
Healthy INTJs are very logical and analytical and often make excellent judges. They don’t judge or examine situations with emotional sentiments and uphold moral and ethical standards as long as they believe they’re doing what’s right.
However, the unhealthy INTJ, trying to be logical, forsakes every other person’s feelings. They don’t care what toes they step on or the hearts they break. They are so focused on achieving their dreams and goals that they genuinely don’t care about any other person.
Why does this happen?
The dominant function of an INTJ is introverted intuition, which causes them to look for underlying patterns and meanings for everything. They can become so warped in that reality that they forget to process their emotions. If they don’t learn to hone their feeling side, they will unintentionally push everyone away with their lack of empathy.
Experts at Giving the Silent Treatment
INTJs live in their heads most of the time, figuring out what to do and how to do it. When they’re obsessed with their thoughts, they completely zone out; sometimes even giving you the death stare. While this may be a good thing and may help them think through things clearly, it could destroy their personal and professional relationships.
For instance, if they feel a certain way, they prefer to process emotions on their own rather than letting the other party know. This habit could unconsciously push people away or make their loved ones feel lost or confused about their actions.
They Always Think They’re Right
Healthy INTJs are strategic and often come up with innovative and creative solutions to various problems. However, they know when to listen to other people or seek superior advice. They are always open to new information and don’t disregard people’s counsel without a good cause, even if that person is beneath them.
Unhealthy INTJs behave the opposite. They always believe they’re right, so they get upset when everyone else doesn’t tow their path.
Why does this happen? They over-inflate their dominant introverted intuition function, so they think have superior knowledge.
They Disregard Their Emotions
Unhealthy INTJs often disregard their emotional sides. They become very harsh and critical of themselves (and sometimes, of other people). They go ahead with their lives even when they’re hurt emotionally.
In most cases, unhealthy INTJs tie their self-worth to productivity and accomplishments, so they struggle so hard to overperform even when they’re sad, lonely, anxious, depressed, or grieving.
When they have burning emotions, they’re quick to push them aside for a long time, almost as though they don’t feel like they deserve to feel such emotions.
If they continue down this path, they may acquire all the success in the world but feel emotionally empty.
They Detest Emotionally Expressive People
Nothing irks an unhealthy INTJ than emotionally expressive people. They not only find them annoying, but also question their motives. They’d rather say condescending things them instead of being open-minded and acceptive.
Why does this happen?
Healthy INTJs understand that not everyone can be like them, so they give room for other personality expressions and behaviors. However, because of their trickster extraverted feeling, they find emotionally expressive people untrustworthy. They put them down or demean them because they feel such people have tricks up their sleeves.
If you’re close to an unhealthy INTJ, you may have issues expressing how you feel. Bottling up emotions around them can drain you faster than you imagine.
They Don’t Take Care Of Themselves
As mentioned, unhealthy INTJs tie their worth and self-esteem to their accomplishments. Because of their introverted intuition, they concentrate more on the abstract world than their physical world. When they’re lost in thought, no external force in their physical sensory world can move them.
They become so focused on their goals and plans that they forget to take care of themselves. They sleep for a few hours, rest a little, barely hydrate, eat bad food, and hardly exercise.
If they continue down this path, they will adapt to uncomfortable situations that can destroy their health over time.
They Prefer Logic Over Truth
This habit is one of the fundamental differences between healthy and unhealthy INTJs. The healthy INTJ prefer knowing the truth than being the right people. They’d rather discover the truth than using logic to justify what they believe.
However, unhealthy INTJs are the complete opposite. They squeeze their ideas and thoughts into a logic box to suit what they think is right. The unhealthy INTJ’s arguments are filled with holes that are visible to everyone except them. Their over-inflated sense of knowledge (due to their introverted intuition) makes them inattentive to other people’s opinions.
They Act Impulsively
Because they don’t adequately take care of themselves, the unhealthy INTJ is prone to stress and fatigue. When they experience chronic stress, they act recklessly and impulsively instead of taking actual steps to relax and rejuvenate.
How do they do this?
If you’re close to an unhealthy INTJ, you may seem them over-eating, binging movies on Netflix, or spend outrageous amounts of money shopping for things they may not necessarily like. When they’re excessively stressed, they may completely zone out of the abstract world and allow everything around to annoy and irritate them.
They Lack Critical Information
Normally, INTJs are the most introverted introverts. They love staying indoors to process their thoughts and emotions, and only have a small circle of trusted friends. However, they balance this introversion by regularly interacting with people, reading books, and seeking trusted counsel.
The unhealthy INTJ, however, is too proud to do any of these. They become so introverted that they isolate themselves from the rest of the world. They have visionary ideas but lack the critical information to back it up or proceed.
Why does this happen?
Their extreme introversion numbs down their inferior function, Extraverted Sensing, which prevents them from gathering critical sensory information and real-world data.
How Can the Unhealthy INTJ improve?
- Detach your self worth your achievements.
- Be intentional about self care. Take time out to nourish your body, spirit, and soul.
- Learn to socialize and interact more to build your empathy levels
- Address your childhood traumas
- Try to understand emotionally expressive people better, rather than shutting them down.
