What is the INTJ friendship compatibility? What exactly does the INTJ want in a friendship considering they don’t have a lot of it? Is it quality, quantity, both, or none? This article would highlight all of these and more.
The INTJ is an introverted loner who feels like they don’t fit in most of the time. They can be shy, protective and reserved. This means they don’t need just about anyone spending time with them. It actually has to mean something for them to give it a try.
If you have an INTJ in your life you want to be friends with them, you might find this article rather helpful. The INTJ are known for their intelligence and loner tendencies amongst other things. But this doesn’t mean they can’t make great friends.
They care about people in their lives and although they might come off as mechanical and robotic sometimes, this has nothing to do with what they feel. They have rather deep emotions and sometimes they just wished people met them half way.
The INTJ isn’t a friend who needs to be in constant communication with you daily to feel important. They need their alone time and no matter how much they love you; constant communication would eventually lead to a need for recharge.
They might find small talk and a lot of activities mundane but for the sake of friendship, they might learn to adapt. However how much is too much? The INTJ can be the most loyal and caring friend you can have. They might come off as aloof loners but there’s a lot more to them. The key is understanding what they want in a friendship: The INTJ Compatibility.
The INTJ Compatibility: What They Need in A Friendship
Here are eight (8) things the INTJ needs in a friendship.
1. Patience
Patience comes as number one as it’s what could be a door to others. The INTJ requires patience because they aren’t quick to trust people and let them into their space. They need someone who would be patient enough through their loner stages. Considering they spend so much time alone, when people come into their lives, it might be a challenge to adapt.
Most people in an INTJs life are mostly acquaintances and it takes a while before they are categorized as friends. They find throwing the word friend around loosely absurd and uncomfortable.
2. Understanding
The INTJ can find connecting with other people difficult. They also tend to sound very formal and this could make the other party uncomfortable. This is why they need a great deal of understanding in order to maintain friendship. Understanding that they have to take their time to express themselves isn’t easy and they know this.
This is why communication and understanding means so much to them. Someone who understands that they get this way sometimes and it might take a while before they get comfortable and informal is all they want.
3. Alone Time
The INTJ requires alone time and anyone who fails to understand or let them have it can not be friends with this personality type. It doesn’t mean they hate you; they just need to be in their own company for a period of time. It helps them think and remain sane.
Scenes of an INTJ going AWOL is not uncommon. Sometimes they get physically and mentally drained from the people around them. Their alone time and moment of peace is crucial. Trying to control them would leave them no other choice but to shut you out.
4. Loyalty
The INTJ can undoubtedly be the most loyal friend you’ve ever had. When they care about you, they go all out. When you earn their trust, try not to lose it because it never comes back. All this is why they expect the very same thing. Loyalty is a key part of friendship to this personality type.
Once you betray an INTJ, it’s over. Even if they happen to forgive you in the future, they would never go back to the friendship. And they do it ever so interestingly. They would just shut you out and act like you do not exist.
5. Inclusion
When you’re friends/acquaintances with an INTJ, one thing you’d notice is how they almost never do anything social and considered interesting by society. This tends to make people around this personality type exclude them from plans. Please do not do this.
The INTJ is very introverted and even when they do not wish to go always, there are days they want to. And when you include them in your plans, it makes them very appreciative. You would be quite surprised how many times they could say yes.
6. Critical Thinking
The INTJ friendship compatibility shows they appreciate people who understand their need for critical thinking. When you tell your problems to an INTJ, the first thing they think of is how to solve this problem. It might come off as emotional unintelligence but that’s how they show care.
However, when they tell you their problems, chances are they’ve already analyzed all the solutions to these problems and would want you to just listen. Offering solutions is also greatly appreciated.
7. Respect
If you know anything about this personality type is how deeply they take respect. They are keen on self respect and would not take disrespect from anyone, regardless of who they are. They place a high value on any form of respect.
When people undermine them and look down on their opinions, insult them, or cut them off in conversations, it completely infuriates them which can eventually lead to a door slam. When they tell you something private, never bring it up in public either. Because they’d never do the same to you.
8. Intellectual Engagement
INTJs love intellectual engagements. Something they can learn from or teach others with. They classify themselves as lifelong learners and they would appreciate if this reflected in their friendships as well.
If you’re looking to be friends with an INTJ, it’s usually easier when you both share something in common. They don’t mind learning more about you but they also want you to learn more about them. This increases the INTJ friendship compatibility more than you’d think.
If you’ve been looking for tips on how to initiate friendship with an INTJ, I hope understanding these helps you in your quest.
