ISFPs are the sweetest, most compassionate people you will ever meet. They ensure that everyone around them is taken care of. However, even the best people have defects. Unhealthy ISFPs can act in specific ways that damage their relationships with other people and hinders their progress.
This article will explore how unhealthy ISFPs behave and what they can do to turn their lives around. Here are signs that identify an unhealthy ISFP. Shall we?
Read: Introverted Thinking: Understanding the Ti Function
What are the Signs You’re an Unhealthy ISFP?
Here are signs to look out for:
Poor Communication Skills
Communication is one of the most significant factors separating healthy ISFPs from unhealthy ones. Healthy ISFPs recognize the importance of effective communication in building relationships, solving conflicts, and creating a healthy community.
However, unhealthy ISFPs lose their regard for all that because they genuinely lack the words to use or don’t care about how anyone else feels. They find it hard to string words together or accurately communicate their feelings when stressed. If you’re close to an unhealthy ISFP, you might find them unable to say things precisely and push you away unconsciously.
If you consistently experience this, do two things: take some time off to rest and ask for help.
They Are Pretty Insensitive.
As mentioned, unhealthy ISFPs are usually very caring and generous. In most cases, they look out for others more than themselves. They take responsibility for their actions, sometimes even the ones they didn’t do to keep the peace.
The unhealthy ISFP doesn’t care about their actions. They don’t care if their words or actions hurt people. They are too focused on achieving their goals and addressing their feelings that they never stop realizing how much their actions affect others.
When they find out the harm they have done, they feel awful about it and try as much as possible to correct their wrongs, if they can.
They Detest Change
Most ISFPs are comfortable with a bit of change and spontaneity now and then, but the unhealthy, trauma-bonded ones don’t. Once they’ve gotten used to something or someone, they find it challenging to step away. In most cases, they’re willing to fight it with every power they have, even if it will benefit them.
Read: How Does the Unhealthy INTJ Behave?
This lousy trait causes them to waver at every unexpected change because it’s impossible to avoid change altogether. Change is a fundamental aspect of human existence. If you can’t adapt to the changing world, someone else will force you to adapt to theirs.
Hard to Accept Criticism
A wise man’s trait is knowing when to accept wise counsel and constructive criticism. Unhealthy ISFPs are too sensitive to criticism, even though it’s for their benefit. They may unintentionally push people away because of this.
Now the problem is that they may not necessarily dislike criticism. Just that their brains can’t distinguish healthy criticism from unhealthy ones because they’re dysfunctional. They have disfigured their brains to see any correction or criticism as indirect hate projection. Once you correct them, they automatically see them as an enemy.
Aside from affecting their relationships, it affects their workplace and their ability to handle leadership positions.
They Avoid Conflicts
You may wonder, “well, who doesn’t?” Well, you’re right.
The typical ISFP avoids conflicts. They hate getting into trouble or putting the people they love at risk. However, they know how to tackle any situation that may endanger them or their family. They don’t run away from difficult conversations or confrontations, but only when it’s necessary.
The unhealthy ISFP takes it up a notch by entirely avoiding conflicts. Uncertainty almost feels like their watchword. They are always one leg in, one leg out when making tough decisions.
They don’t know how to stand up for themselves, so they run and hide instead. People hate staying around them because they get disappointed whenever the unhealthy ISFP runs away from conflicts instead of dealing with the problem head-on.
They Find it Challenging to Decide on Things
Healthy ISFPs also struggle with this because they often consider everyone’s feelings, emotions, and well-being. But they know when to strike the iron when it’s red hot and not be sentimental about it.
The unhealthy ISFPs find it hard to make decisions, even for the most trivial issues. They don’t see the bigger picture so they concentrate so much on their desires and feelings. As an unhealthy ISFP or someone close to one, you will discover that they change their minds a lot.
They can’t seem to decide on one thing, even when there is one option. In other cases, they keep obsessing over little things.
Can be Passive Aggressive
ISFPs are naturally passive aggressive. As mentioned, they avoid conflicts or things that can upset their loved ones. However, this passive aggressive nature could further upset people or push them away.
Instead of tackling the problem, they’d rather sulk, mutter words, or give people the silent treatment. They do this as a way to communicate their feelings to the other party without saying anything, but this behavior can be disturbing.
The other party will be bothered because they won’t know what is wrong or how to effectively communicate their feelings.
Perfection is their Mantra
Healthy ISFPs strive for perfection, and it could pull them in two directions: it could either push them to become their best version or pressure them with unrealistic expectations. Most healthy ISFPs simply strive for perfection to improve their lives and the quality of work they do.
The unhealthy ISFP, however, is traumatized. They seek perfection so much and set unrealistic expectations based on mundane desires. When in leadership positions, they become super aggressive, and overbearing. They start demanding so much from their subordinates. They don’t know how to strike a balance between aiming for excellence and pressuring themselves.
How Can the Unhealthy ISFP Change?
- Lean to effectively communicate your feelings, instead of bottling them up. It could take a while, especially when you were not raised to speak your mind or tell people how you feel. But you can learn, as with anything else.
- Don’t strive for perfection to the point of losing your mind or pressurizing yourself.
- Accept criticism. No one ever succeeds without bearing some harsh words. Learn to filter out the truth and ignore the carcass.
- Learn to embrace change with open arms, not resist it. Otherwise, you’ll never grow.
