Where do introverts find partners? If you’re struggling to find the best places conducive to meeting other introverts, you’re not alone.
Dating is not as easy as romantic movies and people make it seem. You need to do several things right before stepping your feet in the dating pool. For most introverts, dating is daunting because they have to find the right partners first, which means they must go to events, socialize, and actually TALK to people.
Now, this fact doesn’t mean that introverts hate talking to people. They aren’t antisocial. Also, most introverts aren’t shy. There is a thin line between shyness and introversion, and most of them haven’t crossed that line yet.
But finding partners can be hard because it requires a level of social energy to mingle with people and find someone to date. Even if they like someone, they may not have the courage to walk up to the person to initiate a conversation.
Furthermore, it’s not enough to find a dating partner. Introverts need to find other people who can understand their personalities and not feel like they’re being shut out when they need space. It’s possible to date an extrovert as an introvert, but your partner needs to be thoroughly understanding or your relationship will suffer.
As an introvert, how do you navigate this? Where do introverts find partners that understand them?
Here are the top 6 spots you shouldn’t miss out on.
Where Do Introverts Find Partners?
They say that if you want to meet your kind, you should go where your kind stays. Here are the top places introverts like yourself are most likely to be in
Volunteer
Volunteering in any capacity is the best way to leave an impact in the world and meet people who hopefully have the same interests as you do.
If there is a particular course you’re passionate about, whether it’s saving the climate, ensuring that underprivileged children have access to education, girls’ rights, saving rare animals from going extinct, or even helping people receive basic first aid, join organizations that pursue these courses.
If you’re scared of joining large organizations, you could start small. There are several small volunteer or charity groups in your school or church that promote causes that you might be interested in. These groups are small, so they always need helping hands. By joining these organizations, you can make an impact there and be seen.
What is better than finding a partner who is passionate about the same things you’re passionate about? Plus, a partner who loves to help people is always a bonus.
Now as a millennial, you may be wondering if this tip is for you. It’s quite difficult to see people in that age group volunteer. Even if they do, they’re quite a few (especially the men).
Volunteer anyway. Make friends with old and young people. Even though they don’t turn out to be romantic relationships, you can make long-lasting friendships that will serve you.
Online Dating
There is so much controversy around online dating. While some people have found the love of their lives via Tinder and other online dating apps, some people are averse to it. It doesn’t conform to the conventional standards of dating.
Whichever school of thought you belong to, you should definitely consider online dating. Why? Sometimes the old-fashioned way may not give you the partner you desire. You must be willing to experiment and try new things.
As introverts, we love to analyze things and process the emotions we feel. When we meet people the old-fashioned way for the first time, we may get scared and not bring the best of ourselves to the conversation. Shy introverts find this entire process harder.
Online dating helps us to hide behind texts to reveal our true personalities. Online dating apps help introverts to create a stable connection with potential partners and think of good responses to questions with no form of pressure.
When you have built a good rapport over chat, you will feel more at ease and stable when you finally meet them face-to-face because you’ve been building up the vibe. You already know much about the person so it’s easy to flow from there.
Don’t get yourself burned out by trying to act like an extrovert. The online dating scene is here to guide you.
Small Friends and Family Gatherings
As mentioned earlier, introverts aren’t antisocial. They don’t hide or run away from people. However, introverts don’t have a lot of friends or people they talk to. They don’t have sufficient social battery to accommodate all conversations.
Instead, they’re selectively social. They are very mindful of the kind of people they hang around with. When introverts are around people they’re comfortable with, they can talk on and on for hours on end. You’d be surprised that they can be that comfortable and expressive.
This is why small friends and/or family gatherings are the best place to find dating partners because meeting friends through other friends is the best match-making technique.
So, the next time you have a small gathering of friends and family, what should you do?
Firstly, if it’s within your power, ask your friends to come with a friend, specifically those that are dating material. Your friends and family members know your character and will most likely know the type of guy or girl you’d like. There is nothing shameful about asking for help or recommendations from those close to you.
Also, be open-minded. In such small gatherings, there are usually one or two people you probably haven’t met before. Don’t just stick to the people you already know. Make an effort to talk to those new people, even though it’s a simple “Hi” or “Hello”.
Sign Up for a Class
This is almost similar to volunteering. It’s a fantastic way to meet people and socialize with them at your own pace. There is literally little to no pressure to make friends either of the same or opposite gender in such a scenario.
How do you go about this?
First of all, just like volunteering, what are your interests? What are your goals? Where do you want your impact to be greatly felt? When you identify these, then you can finding a class that matches your interests.
So, for instance, you want to have a career in international relations and you need to learn a second language. That’s a great place to start. Look for a class in your vicinity that teaches your language of interest.
Now, this isn’t implying that you should take classes or engage in activities for the sole purpose of finding a partner. Far from it. Taking classes should be a step towards personal growth and development. However, what better way to find someone to date than someone who is in a similar path as you?
This way, the both of you instantly have someone to talk about without having to dip your feet in the muddy waters of small talk.
Religious Houses
There are several exceptions to this option, but a lot of introverted people meet their partners in religious houses like churches, mosques, etc. In most religious houses, there are several sections that cater to different personality types.
If you’re loud and love to mingle with people, they’re most likely departments that cater to your needs. If you’re quiet, introverted, and love to serve in silence, then they will have something for you as well.
By joining the group that suits your personality type, you’re most likely going to meet people with compatible personality types. Most churches even organize singles’ groups and conferences to help people gain godly partners.
As mentioned earlier, you shouldn’t go to religious houses because you’re looking for an introverted partner. If you’re spiritually inclined, they can serve as a place of comfort and solace. But there is nothing better than getting an introverted partner that finds solace in the same things you find solace in.
Go Where Introverts are More Likely to Hang Out
Introvert love their personal space. Even when they go out, they go to places that still allow them to retain that space. So any chill place works for them. What are these places? Bookshops, libraries, art galleries, coffee shops, cafes, etc.
Why do introverts love going to these places? Most introverts go there with zero intention of interacting with anybody. The world is terribly extroverted. Everything in it is designed to get you socially exhausted and drained. Whenever introverts can have their privacy at a public space, they cherish it.
The key is to go to extroverted places and do introverted things. Most introverts who have succeeded in getting dating partners in venues like these found their partners based on interest.
For instance, they constantly visited the library and found solace in one section of the library. Or they would go to one side of the cafe and work or read a book.
So, go to the cafe to work or read that novel. Fight the urge to always stay indoors. Get that new book from your public library instead of ordering it online. You’re more likely to meet a dating partner in places where introverts gather.
